random footnotes ...
Ray sends this ""NEWS FLASH!!!"
CLINTON NOW ADMITS THAT HE HAD ORAL SEX WITH FOUR WOMEN, BUT...... HE DID NOT COME.
Clinton's new nickname? The Unabanger.
Seems that Kenneth Starr has finally found his smoking gun. Too bad it's in the President's pants.
In a survey of American women, when asked, "Would you sleep with President Clinton", 86% replied, "Not again"
What's the new game they're playing in the White House? Swallow the Leader.
What does Monica Lewinsky have on her resume?
Several versions:
(1) "Sat on the Presidential Staff"
(2) "Worked on Presidential Balls"
(3) "Attended Presidential [e]Missions"
(4) "Gave rise to Presidential Erections"
(5) "Received Presidential DNA Award"
When did Clinton realize Paula Jones wasn't a Democrat?
When she didn't swallow everything he presented.
What's the definition of an Arkansas Virgin?
A girl that can run faster than the Governor.
THE TOP 14 NICKNAMES FOR THE PRESIDENT'S MEMBER
14. The Speaker of the House
13. Free Willy
12. Presidential Erection
11. The Sin Doctor
10. Hail to the Beef
9. The Secret Servicer
8. The Pocket Veto
7. The Cabinet Member
6. Titanic (because 1,500 people went down on it)
5. The Gross National Product
4. The Washington Monument
3. The Commander in briefs
2. The Washington Post
and the #1 nickname for the President's member...
1. The Executive Branch
President Clinton looks up from his desk in the Oval Office to see one of his aides nervously approach him.
"What is it?" exclaims the President.
"It's this Abortion Bill, Mr. President -- what do you want to do about it?" the aide replies.
"Just go ahead and pay it."
Q: What is Bill's definition of safe sex?
A: When Hillary is out of town.
Q: How does Bill keep Monica Lewinsky away from the White House?
A: He keeps offering to send Ted Kennedy over to give her a ride.
It seems the President's secretary was starting to get suspicious. Whenever she told Monica, "The President will see you now," Monica spit out her gum.
rlw / vamp@vamp.org